Oct 16, Submit. You might be saying to yourself: relationship “addiction”? . I'm blessed to have a wonderful person in my life right now, a new sweetie. Love and relationship addiction is a form of intimacy disorder that can be to the point of obsession with intense romantic fantasies and new relationships. Oct 23, Because a love, sex, or relationship addiction cannot happen without a has left them needing to kill their pain via a new “cure-all relationship.
For this kind of addict, love is their drug of choice and the feeling of falling in love is the emotional high that keeps them looking for repeat experiences.
While something about love addiction might sound fairy-tale like, such patterning is emotionally destructive to the addict and their partner. Like other addictions, the process of developing an addiction to love or relationships is a complicated one. These experiences lead to avoidance of true intimacy as an adult and an unconscious desire to repeat similar relationship dynamics e.5 Factors That Make Him Addicted To You
These resulting behaviors are due to their lacking an accurate, healthy understanding of what a loving relationship looks and feels like.
Furthermore, the love-addicted experience a less-developed sense of self or a deep incompleteness, and do not know how to make themselves whole outside of a relationship.
The Psychology of Addictive Relationships
Love addicts spend a great deal of time fantasizing about love and their relationship with their love object. When in a relationship, a love addict becomes intolerably uncomfortable when their partner pulls away, and in some cases, this withdrawal can cause them to engage in unhealthy behaviors, including manipulation, abuse, substance use a co-occurring problem for some love addictsthreats, and game-playing.
These behaviors ultimately destroy the relationship and result in the very sense of rejection that they fear. To better understand love addiction and the ways it prevents long-term, fulfilling relationshipshere are some tell-tale signs of love addiction: If a love addict is in relationship, they typically: For fewer, the separation from or rejection by a partner, can result in a love addict being at risk to hurt themselves or others.
Treatment for Love Addiction If you are concerned that you might be suffering from love addictionprofessional help and support is essential to overcoming symptoms and beginning the process of recovery.
The Psychology of Addictive Relationships
Oftentimes the biggest hurdles to recovery are admitting the problem, committing to change, and adapting the necessary treatment e. Understanding the unique experience of a love addict can be a lifelong journey. Both Pia Mellody and Melody Beattie offer wisdom to help love addicts and codependents understand and overcome their tendencies.
Hick specializes in relationship therapyincluding the dynamics of love addiction and relationship anxiety. Contact her today to discuss whether love addiction therapy is right for you.
Love addicts need to live in reality. Only time and experiences with another person can provide us with this information.
Love Addiction: A Quest to Fill the Void
Therefore, a non-addictive relationship will grow and become more settled over time, while an addictive one will burn out. Partners in an addictive relationship have extreme difficulty navigating normal relational difficulties as they arise, whereas partners in healthy relationships frequently navigate difficulties from the beginning.
In a love-addicted relationship, honesty is lacking, and the underlying truth regarding the dynamics of the relationship are not safe to talk about openly. This is a relationship that lacks true intimacy.
Center for Shared Insight | Love Addiction: Filling the Void
True intimacy involves the ability to talk openly about fears, concerns, and topics that delve beyond the surface, and which are risky to discuss. It does not involve blaming or deflecting to avoid taking responsibility that is so characteristic of an addictive relationship.
In early childhood, addicts often found that it was not safe to be authentic and real with another person. Rather, as coping mechanisms, these children learned to preserve themselves by detaching from their feelings. Bringing this coping style into adult relationships creates potentially toxic dynamics.
She is the author of Erotic Intelligence: